I always consider January as one of the most reflective out of the twelve months. For the beginning days of the New Year, an individual is inclined to look back to the previous year and accumulate all the lessons learned as well as all the revelations encountered. After considering all the occurrences of the past year in that person’s life, they begin to set a new goal for themselves or, more commonly known, a New Years Resolution.
Setting a resolution doesn’t necessarily need to be a physical or active transformation in your life such as losing weight, quitting smoking, making more money etc. On the contrary, a New Year’s Resolution can be a change in the way you think or the way you want to perceive the world in the upcoming months. Essentially, a New Year’s goal can be geared towards transforming yourself mentally and intellectually.
Needless to say, 2012 proves to set the tone for this intellectual transformation. 2011 was, overall, another remarkable year that has now come and gone; however, it has brought to my attention a valuable life lesson that I plan to take with me into the New Year… avoid the Green-Eyed Monster.
My parents are never hesitant to speak their mind, which I’ve always appreciated throughout my upbringing. One of the most valuable lessons I obtained from their teachings was discussing the different types of individuals that I will be subjected to as I enter the real world. They were quick to advise that the worst type of human being to encounter is a jealous and envious one.
Being young at the time of this discussion, I was living a phantasmal world where I truly believed that once you enter adulthood, no such quality exists in an individual. We grow up, we become professionals, we mind our own business. But let’s be logical and reasonable here folks.
One of the most grotesque, vicious, and shameful characteristics any individual can possess is that of envy towards another person. It is deemed a heartless act that cannot be easily pardoned. Possessing jealousy is not just a sentiment that someone withholds; an individual can also act upon it. They can manipulate others into believing falsities about you and attempt to indirectly sabotage you in any way they can. While some live life through rose-colored glasses, others see through green. Their eyes only see the best quality in a person in the worst way. Hence why I dub these individuals as the Green-Eyed Monsters.
Unfortunately, for us humans, a Green-Eyed Monster is not easily identifiable. For the initial meet and greet, you are exposed to an artificial persona. Friendly, kind, and courteous, you can expect the whole package. It isn’t until your relationship blossoms into a strengthening friendship that the transformative phase begins. This is their tactic. They spend time with you and coax you into talking about your successes as they gain your trust. They thrive on the positive aspects of your life that you share with them, the personality traits that make people want to hang out with you, and the physical qualities that make others attracted to you.
“You’re great!” “You’re fantastic!” “That’s incredible!” “Amazing job!” They’ll respond, cringing inside as they flash a big smile. Appreciative for having such a supportive friend, you move forward, oblivious to the consequences that are ahead.
It may take days, it may take months, it may even take years until this person exposes his or her inner self. Nonetheless, the big reveal will come.
No matter what action they commit against you, the deed is done. A simple apology will not suffice (that is if they even have the courage to apologize to your face), you must acknowledge that this was a voluntary act and they had a choice. They chose to behave maliciously against you. Is this the kind of friend you want?
As much as you feel the urge to mend the situation, a jealous individual cannot revert back to normality. Nobody can change another person, only they can change themselves. A person of that quality does not deserve the opportunity to enjoy the company of a decent human being. Having you as a friend is a privilege, not a right.
For those that possess envious qualities, they need to realize how villainous of a trait he or she has. Their unattractive character will push everyone away and they are only left with themselves to idolize. People who are like this may either have familial issues, image issues, or even self-esteem issues. They then take their inner aggression out on others who are content and live successful lives with confidence. They commit social brutality towards others while bringing the unnecessary drama to come out and play.
Irrespective, as heartbreaking as their lives may be, nobody forced them to act this way. If you are a functioning member of society and have been taught right versus wrong, then you have the full-fledged capability of controlling the choices that are made. There are no excuses and no exceptions. Grow up.
Being subjected to a Green-Eyed Monster might place a temporary strain in your social life, but we must take these challenging moments as a lesson to live by. Instances like these enable us to understand that meeting an individual of such high caliber is one of many treasure hunts we are given in life. The good people are out there, just trust fate to be the map that will guide you in the right path.
And thus, after years “truly believing” that we outgrow juvenile behavior, 2011 proved me wrong. I invite you all to rethink your resolutions for this year. Commit to the ones already made, but consider including an intellectual resolution. A goal you can set to positively transform the way you think about others and maybe even yourself. Think about the way you’ve been treated, the way you want to be treated, and how you want to treat others for the New Year. A change in your attitude as well as how you perceive others may just be the trick to bypassing those Green-Eyed Monsters out there.