Friends Grow on Trees. Pick Wisely.
They always say that college is the best four years of your life. It’s where you’ll meet your life long friends and create unforgettable memories. As we build these powerful friendships, whether in school or in life, we must always tune in to our rational thinking and assure ourselves that the friends we chose define what a friend means to us.
The educational atmosphere is a portal to a social realm where we are constantly constructing in our minds ways we can simply belong. Essentially, by day we think with our minds, and by night we seek with our hearts.
It’s difficult to function at a university unless you attain access to some social capabilities.
For some they feel pressured and seek a quick fix by finding the first group of friends that will accept them. The consequences speak for themselves. Yes, you have what appears to be a friend, but you don’t have what is defined as a friend. They’ll mistreat you once, twice, three times and more, but you’ll just keep excusing their actions, because after all, everyone makes mistakes. Rational thought is impeded by our thirst for acceptance.
For others, they simply just let nature take its course, allowing destiny to unite them with the group they belong to. They’ll get to know them, spend some time with them, and find the commonalities that may exist between the two of them. You go through a process; you discover what you cherish most about that friend and if they will be that positive impact you’ll need in the future. These people are more likely to have those friendships that are worth the time, are valuable, and will, in the end, last forever.
This might sound somewhat cliché to most of you, but what we don’t realize is that this cliché analysis blossoms into the main problem that exists within our generation… We don’t think before we act.
And it amazes me. Why aren’t people seeking friends with good and decent qualities? Or better yet, why do people stop searching for friends after they have nestled into a group of their own?
In one of my classes this past year we learned about how our society is living in a fast paced environment. Everyone is reliant on technology to give us answers in the quickest way possible disrupting our independent thinking. I feel that this is what our generation has come to. We pick the first set of people that accept us, and we skip the entire process of getting to know someone. You want to know how people on Facebook get thousands of friends? There’s your answer. They don’t care about how they met you, who you are, or what you do, they just know that they did meet you, and the easiest way to classify you as a friend is by connecting through Facebook. Accepting a friend online gives you that quick answer that you’ve been looking for to this question: Are we friends?
We always look at the exteriors. Just because some guy likes to drink, and that girl is a risk taker, doesn’t mean they’ll make a great friend.
This week I’ve had a lot of time to think, and consider the kinds of actions that our generation takes in this world in regards to friendships. It’s disappointing to see that those that possess the qualities of a good friend get left behind, while the deceivers excel socially. However, when we reach those times when our head is down, you have to lift it back up and tell yourself… They’re the ones missing out.
Having these encounters has made me a stronger person and a wiser picker out of the friend tree.
A person should have zero tolerance for anyone that disrespects them, because you know that you have worked extremely hard to be the best friend you can be. You certainly don’t deserve that kind of treatment. You have to have the “if you’re nice to me I’m nice to you,” attitude and it’s the time when it becomes a one-way street that you should close your lane down. You should always stand your ground.
It is only natural to feel some form of upset, but this cannot be a long lasting effect. A betrayer has done its job when it leaves their victims scarred. You can’t let someone dominate you like this. Strength must accumulate to allow you to carry on with your life and join society once again, continuing the search for your true friends. When they see your happiness without them, they know they’ve failed.
The thoughtless acts of our generation can further be associated with boyfriend/girlfriend relationships. Everyone is so accustomed to finding the easy bait that everyone else who is worth dating is avoided. But that’s another topic we’ll discuss at another time.
It’s an unfortunate circumstance when no one is willing to take the time and effort to do the right thing, benefiting them in the long run. Instead they do the wrong thing, which only satisfies their needs in the short run. What a smart move.
The point that I’m trying to make is, that we all need to take a moment in our lives and assess the relationships we have. Are your friends treating you right? Are you treating your friends right? Be honest with yourself.
Some people don’t value the importance of a friendship. What people don’t understand is that friends are the people that will be surrounding your life, they will characterize who you are, and they will be the ones you rely on for support when you need it. Think for yourself; don’t let easy accessibility get in your way of finding good quality people in your life. Most importantly, don’t let one person’s cruel decisions destroy you. Things happen for a reason, and if that person was not meant to be in your life, then that means there’s a better person out there waiting to meet the best friend they’ll ever have.